-Don’t Paint Me Black, When I Used To Be Golden-
“This is your life,
There’s no way to run from it.
The doubt in your brain,
Or the pain in your stomach.
I only have but one complaint at the moment…
…Don’t Paint Me Black, When I Used To Be Golden.”
“I ABSOLUTELY FORBID IT, FATHER!!!”(The scene has opened to a VERY pink room as Levi’s only daughter Rosie stomps around her “theater” and we see Levi sitting on the edge of the bed rubbing his temples.)
Levi Russow: Rosie…ya gotta listen to reason on this one.
Rosie Russow: I’M IN LOVE WITH HIM, FATHER!!!
Levi Russow: Rosie you are TEN.
Rosie Russow: Love KNOWS no age, you brute!
Levi Russow: …and there’s no way you’re gonna be cool about this?
Rosie Russow: If you harm…ONE hair…on his perfect head…
Levi Russow: Rosie he’s coming to HURT me. Like not WRESTLE me, HURT me. Don’t you have any concern for your dear old man?
Rosie Russow: Of COURSE I do…
Levi Russow: That’s very swee-
Rosie Russow: Mom’s too PRETTY to go back to being punched in the face so you have to pay the bills.
Levi Russow; I…Rosie, you know your mom was a wrestler right?
Rosie Russow: Uhhh…the BEST ONE, too.
Levi Russow: …owww. Mmkay, good talk Rosie.
Rosie Russow: NOT A HAIR ON HIS HEAD YOU HAPLESS HOOLIGAN!!!
(The door SLAMS shut behind him and he kinda snaps to attention as suddenly Rosie’s twin brother Charlie comes walking by…nose in a book…not watching where he’s going.)
Levi Russow: Uhh…on your left.
(Charlie stops, sidesteps the house plant, and continues off reading effortlessly saying a weak…)
Charlie Russow: Quite…thank you father. Oh and good luck with the fight…I suppose…
(Everyone rushes to their respective rooms slamming the doors as Levi just looks around confused.)
Levi Russow; Well…I THOUGHT I had a family at least…
(We switch from the somber scene of Levi sitting on his staircase alone in the echoing halls of his manor…as the camera flies past him in a half circle the staircase shifts and we’re sitting on the staircase with a stack of pictures in his hand. And a small trash fire burning nearby.)
Levi Russow: And now we come to the great…Finn…Whelan. See you think I was putting you on blast on Twitter ‘cause you thought I just wanted attention...and you’re right! Cause I looked at you Finn...and I thought I saw a kindred soul. I looked at how hard you fought...how no matter how many people came at you, you stepped up and handled your business...and I thought I saw one of my kind but you’re NOT. And you could NEVER BE. Christ, I don’t even know why I GIVE a fuck I just thought MAYBE...if we took what I knew with what you can do...you could be even MORE unstoppable but then I saw what you did to Dickie…
(Levi looks at the pictures of him standing with his arms around both his brothers necks.)
Levi Russow: I don’t give a shit...that it’s Dickie Watson, you tried to hurt. I don’t give a shit that it was your family at ALL frankly...what I saw was a brother, who probably needs his brother, get popped by the brother that he needs and no you’re right! It’s none of my fuckin’ business. But...Iunno see i got this thing with my brain...and it gets me into a lotta trouble sometimes. Like now! Bookies got you absolutely flooring me within five minutes, they gotcha by a landslide and I get that...Hell if I were a bettin’ man, I’d take those odds if I weren’t accused of throwing the fight. And I think you’re tough. Man, I think you’re one of the toughest and yeah that might be a little bit of a lovefest, I’m sure you’re not used to many things with a pulse having any sort of love for you. Y’know what!? Maybe THAT’S it.
(Levi takes the rest of the photos and just frisbees them into the air as they scatter, some landing in the fire, Levi doesn’t seem to care.)
Levi Russow: Maybe it’s an OBSESSION with you. Because ooh your tongue is just so, so silver and sharp! And your wit is razor clean! And I, being a glutton for punishment, oh God I just love me a good roast. So go on! What’s it gonna be!? Old? Alone? Done For? Not quite, Codfish. See I think you’re mistaking my kindness...for weakness. You took me pushing your buttons as me turning on you instead of making you FINALLY GIVE ME...MY GODDAMN MATCH!!! I even let you pick the time and place…I walked into YOUR kingdom, your “domain” to which you so desperately cling. No cancer, no crash…it better all go as planned, huh? That was until you crossed my fuckin’ path. See cause I understand who I am and where I come from and I completely understand this looks like nothing but a vainglorious grasp for fleeting fame. You’d say that, wouldn’t you Finn? Fuck…maybe you’re right. Maybe I’m SCARED. Maybe I’m TERRIFIED that I’m going to fade into obscurity…when I die my entire legacy is just gonna fade. And I built an empire…it’s more than a Brand, it’s more than a “Faction”, I call them The Family because GODDAMMIT…THOSE PEOPLE…ARE MY GODDAMN FAMILY.
(Levi taps the temple of his head repeatedly pacing back and forth…it feels like an episode is oncoming.)
Levi Russow: And FAMILY…is a Goddamn huge word for me. So no, it might not have been any of my business and I don’t really give a good Goddamn about that little whelp either but once you call him “brother” you don’t get to DO shit like that because that’s not fucking FAMILY. But what would you know about it? You and your nut huggin’ chick pants and your Jack Skellington wannabe lookin’ ass. What? Yeah, yeah I know, you’ve heard it all before but it’s still gonna make ME feel better to be the one sayin’ it. You wanna take off the kid gloves? Let’s take off the kid gloves. I’m dealing with TWINS…entering PUBERTY…and my fucking SWEET LITTLE GIRL…HAS DECIDED YOU, FINN WHELAN…ARE HER FIRST CRUSH. And oh my God I didn’t think that’d bother me so much ‘cause fuck…she’s gonna be eleven. What the fuck am I saying…that’s not why I hate you. Let’s drop it. Drop the “respect” I had planned to give you after the match…you don’t get that anymore. Let’s drop the “professionalism” I conduct myself with! You don’t get THAT anymore EITHER! Because I have been sent by the world to reveal you for the scared little BITCH that you are. You got a problem with me throwing threats around? I’m so sorry that it hurts your tender sensibilities but…
(Levi starts shaking his head like he can’t believe it as he maniacally runs his hands through his hair screaming.)
Levi Russow: Finn Whelan…God DAMN your putrid, black heart Finn Whelan! Why does this MEAN so much to me!? It’s because you didn’t think I noticed when you would…you would throw your little stones. Your little pebbles and then when I’d fire back, I’M the jilted lover who’s just itching for a FIGHT. And you’re FUCKIN’ right a fight is exactly what I want! Because I am just SO FUCKING SICK AND TIRED…of walking on EGGSHELLS around you, man!? They say I’M the crazy one, you’ll fly off the handle at the first little nudge! And you wanna criticize ME? Uh-uh lil’ boy…you don’t get that right either. All I’ve heard from you is “there is no respect. I won’t shake your hand. I’m a fuckin’ Terminator that takes myself WAY too seriously” because the truth of the matter IS Finn…no one actually…fucking…does.
(Levi clicks his teeth as his eyebrows furrow deeper and deeper and the anger starts to rise in him and he can feel the old Levi pumping through his veins again.)
Levi Russow: And you think about it, WHO DO YOU KNOW? You and I did this dance for YEARS and when you FINALLY let your stones BREATHE for a second, *snaps fingers* we have a PLACE, we have a TIME, we have a DATE…so who do you know? Hmm? What pull does the great FINN “BIG DICK” WHELAN have around PWE that made this fight so quick because I swear…to Christ and all my dead friends…if you have any thoughts or misconceptions about how this is going to end for you, it ends in RED…until its BLACK.
*Levi starts laughing a little crazier than usual as he starts…singing?*
Levi Russow: Viiiiiiolent Niiiiight.
Fall on my knife.
Shed your blood.
Give your life.
Round these parts
You been running to long.
No one here is going to
Miss you when you’re gone.
Sleeeeep in absolute dooooog shiiiiiit.
Finn Whelan is my next hiiiiiiiit.
(Levi smiles warmly into the camera for a good few seconds…almost like he’s forgotten time and space visualizing what he’s about to do to the tattooed little screamer from Who Fuckin’ Cares where.)
Levi Russow: I kick myself because I should have named my everlasting finishing maneuver 21 Grams. D’you know why, Finn? It’s because it’s a popular belief in the scientific community that the moment a person dies they become 21 grams lighter…which they estimate to be how much a soul weighs. Did you know that Finn? I like interesting little tidbits like that. And think about it! You said you had nothing to learn from me. Isn’t that funny…there are certain breeds of North Atlantic penguins that have an organ in their eyelids that converts saltwater to freshwater. There…that one's free. Pretty smart for someone that never went to high school, eh? You learn on the fly around here!
(Levi starts to walk down the hallway out into the training rings area.)
Levi Russow: THIS…is where I graduated high school. Well…not LITERALLY here, but you get the gist of what I’m saying. See I always thought I was gonna struggle through this life until my beloved wife Elise taught me how to read and write and helped me get my G.E.D. but I figure you don’t care about that. All YOU need to know, is I may have a G.E.D but I’ve got a p.H.D in kickin’ that weird sized head off that tiny fuckin’ body. FUCK you Finn Whelan. Fuck your pomade-caked hair, fuck your shitty ass homemade tattoos, fuck your size 00 women’s jeggings you think give you so much freedom, fuck your relationships, fuck your homeboys, fuck your little brother and his busted ass arm, fuck what the fuck you THOUGHT you were gonna do to me, fuck them clownshoes, fuck the horse you rode in on, and most importantly FUCK…YOUR PITIOUS…LIFE. I’m the fuckin’ ICEMAN!!! I am the King of New York! I am the Asshole from Alaska! I’m King Shit on Fuck Mountain and you’re GODDAMN LUCKY I’m gracing you this rub! Don’t you NEVER in your life fuckin’ tell me what you gonna do to me like I don’t get a say in it. Yes, Finn…I’m gonna be fucked up after this match. Have you even seen my style?
(Levi springs and rolls into the ring, kipping up and continuing.)
Levi Russow: I’ll fuck myself up twice as bad if it means YOU get it just a little more painful. You wanna get kamikaze, kid? We’ll get fuckin’ kamikaze. ‘Cause I’m sick of you. I’m sick of your face, your attitude, your holier-than-thou asshole air of just slimy fuckery. I’m done talkin’ Finn…now? Now I keep my promise. Because NOW…
…now I’m just gonna punch you in the face…really…REALLY…hard.
(We see Levi call in his 4:00 class for a huddle as Levi turns around and stands crossing his arms.)
Levi Russow: …you’re still here.
(Levi looks confused as he starts to turn sideways before quipping.)
Levi Russow: …the movie’s over now!...go home.
(Levi waves the camera off with a smile as he turns and takes a knee teaching his next class.)
